bull

While reading Bull, I was very interested in the mental changes that the appearance of the vagina in Bull's knee pit brought about. Bull's emotional transformation is very different than Carol's in Cock when she grows a penis because while she grows colder and more aggressive, Bull becomes very vulnerable and sensitive- more womanly, altogether. Even before he finds out the truth about the vagina and still thinks it's a burn/wound, Bull can still feel the effects that having the vagina has on his mind when he debates going to a bar: "Bull visualized the interior of the Bald-Faced Stag. It was dark and thick with acrid smoke. Big-pig men stood about in suits leaning against things. As the door swung open to reveal Bull, their dead brown eyes tracked him across the carpet tiles, stripping away his clothes.... That was it! I feel really vulnerable, realized Bull with a shock." Here, the reader can see that he is clearly thinking about the bar in the mindset of a female because of the way he describes how uncomfortable and singled out he would feel walking into the bar. Of course, the men in the bar would really just see Bull, a seemingly normal other guy, but Bull, his thinking influenced by his new vagina, is still subconsciously put off but doesn't know why. However, during Bull's violent, desperate outburst when Alan tells him the truth about his vagina, he comes to a realization about the confused, vulnerable feelings he had been having recently: "Bull understood it all. Understood the feelings of vulnerability that had been troubling him all day; understood the difficulties he had had in analyzing the sensations that the wound, or burn, had provoked in him.... Bull understood certain deep and painful things about himself that had always shamed him." Bull's reaction to having sex with Alan is also that of a stereotypical female: "Will I see you again?' Bull was shy, almost blushing."So now we have the interesting if not humorous juxtaposition of a burly, broad backed rugby player, very masculine, with emotions similar to those of a shy young girl. Carol's transformation in Cock is much different than Bull's because she became alienated from the world, raped and killed her husband and blamed it on another man, and became an aggressive vengeful person to make up for the weakness that she used to have. However, Bull changed in a much more positive way by becoming very much more open and sensitive to the world.